What is IFS Therapy?
Internal Family Systems (also known as IFS or Parts Work) is an evidence-based approach that views the mind as made up of different "parts," each with its own perspective, feelings, and role. Some parts protect you by keeping you busy, in control, or emotionally distant. Others carry pain from the past, like shame, fear, or grief, that never fully got resolved. Rather than trying to eliminate or override these parts, IFS helps you understand them, so they can trust you enough to soften.
At the center of every person, IFS also recognizes what's called "Self," the calm, curious, compassionate core that's always there beneath the noise of your protective parts. The goal of IFS isn't to get rid of any part of you. It's to help your parts trust that Self is capable of leading, so they no longer have to work so hard to protect you.
How IFS Works
IFS works by helping you build a relationship with your different parts instead of being controlled by them or fighting against them. When something triggers you, a part of you steps forward, maybe one that shuts down, lashes out, or overworks to keep things "fine." Rather than judging that reaction or trying to push through it, IFS helps you get curious about it. What is this part trying to protect you from? What does it need you to know?
As you build trust with a part, it often reveals what's underneath it, frequently a younger, more vulnerable part carrying pain, fear, or shame from earlier in your life. From a place of Self, calm, curious, and compassionate, you're able to be with that part in a way it may never have experienced before. Over time, as your parts learn that Self can lead and that old pain has finally been witnessed, they no longer have to work so hard to protect you.
What To Expect
Consultation
We'll start with a free 30-minute call, where I'll answer any questions you have and we can figure out together if this feels like the right fit.
Getting Started
In our first sessions, we'll spend time understanding your history and getting to know your inner world, the parts of you that show up most often, protect you, or feel stuck. There's no pressure to have it all figured out. We build this map together.
Ongoing Sessions
IFS unfolds over time, session by session. From week to week, we'll dive into different experiences and moments from your life to understand how your parts are showing up in the world, in a conversation that felt tense, a moment you shut down, a decision you second-guessed. We'll get to know your parts one at a time, with curiosity instead of judgment, building trust so they feel safe enough to soften. Some sessions feel gentle and exploratory. Others go deeper into pain that's been carried for a long time. We move at whatever pace feels right for you.
Is IFS Right For Me?
IFS can help with a wide range of experiences, especially when you notice conflicting or extreme reactions within yourself. You might be a good fit for IFS if you experience:
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Anxious, avoidant, or disorganized attachment patterns
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Dissociation, numbness, or feeling disconnected from yourself
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Depersonalization, where things around you don't feel real, or you feel disconnected from your own surroundings
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People-pleasing, perfectionism, or an inner critic that feels relentless
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Shutting down or feeling frozen during conflict or stress
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Childhood emotional neglect or feeling like you had to shrink to be loved
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A sense of being at war with yourself, wanting one thing while doing another
If you're not sure whether IFS is the right fit, that's a completely normal place to start. We can talk through it together during a free consultation.
Frequently Asked Questions
If you recognized yourself in these patterns, the shutting down, the inner critic, the sense of fighting your own reactions, please know this isn't who you are. It's what your parts learned to do to keep you safe. And it can change.